The Grey (2011): Fighting the Good Fight
An uplifting scene about not being afraid when entering the fray
The Grey is a movie about enduring after losing someone you love and finding yourself in a dark, desolate place.
At the beginning of the movie, we learn that the main character’s relationship with his wife has shifted in some unfortunate way. Shortly after, when flying home from an Alaskan oil factory where he defends oil workers from wolves as a sharpshooter, the plane crashes in the wilderness. As he leads the survivors to civilization, one of the men turns against him. Meanwhile, the icy wind is brittling their bones and wolves are attacking them at every step.
My favorite scene is when the main character finds himself alone in the wolves’ den at the end of the movie. It’s his seemingly unfortunate reward for hanging on. So unfortunate it’s almost funny. “The den — it’s their fucking den,” he says to himself. But it’s here where he reaches a point of surrender — not to the wolves, but to uncertainty. This surrender to uncertainty is a blessing that frees him, and it finally clicks as to why he’s been remembering these words from his wife throughout the movie: Don’t be afraid.
This scene contains a spoiler about the relationship with his wife. I recommend not watching it if your interest is piqued and you haven’t seen this movie.
Everything has brought him to this moment where he must make a choice: to use the fear to keep holding on, or to use the fear to melt his heart. He chooses the latter and anger about his wife and resentment toward his father are washed away. He can now enter into a “good” fight with the wolf. Like many great lessons, this is one in letting go. But the lesson goes deeper in saying to not deny what’s in front of you: a big ass wolf. Fight the wolf, but do so with an open heart.
Once more into the fray…
Into the last good fight I’ll ever know.
Live and die on this day…
Live and die on this day…
This is one of the scenes I rewatch the most. I think because the wolf can represent any fear that I must move through at a given time. But, deeper than that, the wolf can represent an opportunity to direct fear with equanimity. I don’t need to “fight” and win. I’ve done this before and it has led to treating people unkindly, including myself. I also don’t need to submit. I've done this before and it has led to regret for placing more importance on someone else’s stance than my own. What’s better is to use the fear as a catalyst to direct a deeper issue causing the fear. After that, I can direct what’s in front of me and fight a good fight.
Which fear is staring you in the face? What’s behind the fear? How will directing that allow you to fight a good fight?
This beautiful talk about equanimity crossed my path after writing this: https://youtu.be/VNZyW7_bLLU. “Equanimity is not to avoid conflict or avoid change. It is finding a balance in the midst of it.”